So QTEC’s softball team has officially won its second game, ever! Today we played a scrimmage against Newtown+Grace Church, and although there was a long delay and rain, and a lot of train-wreck innings, we finally won! It was only by one run though. Sometimes playing sports can really bring out the competitive side in me, haha. I feel bad for kind of yelling at Klaw cause he was about to score. All in all, it was really great to see our team finally turn around. Watching Sharon with her clipboard really makes her look like the team manager; Mama Yeung! I was talking to Naomi about the progress of our team, and I told her about the one thing I really love about us despite our streak of bad records. I know there are still a lot of fundamentals we need to work on, and honestly, lately some people’s commitment and motivation to improve were kind of annoying. But despite all our losses, I love that at every practice or every game, we have members of the YG and the C&CG supporting the team. Every now and then we would get some adults too, although it is majority still young English speaking people. I think it really shows the unity within our English Ministry. I know there are a lot of times that we should be reaching out also, but I think when one side does something, it somehow always affects some parts of the other group. I really love that the people in the C&CG really care about the younger kids in YG, and that YG kids also return the love.
On a slightly different note though, on the ride back home today, I was talking to Jeff about some people in our lives who I wish had more of a spiritual growth because they grew up in the church. I finally saw one of my best friend today. Although it was brief, it was definitely worth seeing Becca again. When Dan and I went out to greet her dad (because we thought he was picking her up), I was surprised to see her brother Abe behind the wheels instead. It was just a surreal realization that we’re actually growing up. I remember the days when we used to go to her house on Saturday nights and play downstairs while the adults held Bible Studies upstairs. Of the few people who I wish grew more spiritually, Becca is one of them that really breaks my heart and I don’t know what I can do about it. I trust the fact that she will look for her own resources, knowing her parents, I don’t doubt that. I’ve spoken to her about this before, about how as a Stuy student, a lot of her free time is spent doing prep and studying. Not to put all Stuy kids into that category, but when school is in session, I see very little of her; and she almost never picks up the phone calls. The worst part for me is that both of us know how things can be like if she didn’t spend so much time on the academics. She told me once that she realizes how much deeper she can grow spiritually if she gave up all the studying. But at the same time, we want to do whatever we can to help ease our families’ financial burdens, and unfortunately the only way we know how to do that is to attain high grades. I am so conflicted on this because it feels like the choice is only one or the other for her. I don’t think that’s entirely true, I know there are people who are able to balance both. But the worst part for me is that because I understand what she’s going through, I hold my tongue about it and just let her be. At the same time, I feel like I really should be doing something to help her. I just feel so helpless, and watching how Abe kind of drifted away from church-life, I am half-scared for Becca. I think she’s grown complacent with where her walk is, so she doesn’t really actively pursue God. But there is too much history behind our lives, and I just can’t stand here and do nothing about it; yet I can’t bring myself to be the one who points that out to her because a part of me always believes that she will find the way herself. The only thing Jeff could say to me was just to keep praying for them.
I’ve been feeling kind of sick this whole day. My throat has been bothering me this whole day and it still is. I knew this whole lack of rest thing would eventually catch up to me, I was just hoping that I would get to reorganize my pattern before it actually does. I think I just might call in sick to work tomorrow. But this is the last week of Summer Day Camp…oh God, what are you trying to teach me this summer?